So I told you about my new job last year, and I also told you about how much I missed working in an actual bookshop. Then I wnt pretty quiet for a bit, then I told you about how I wanted to concentrate more on the good things in my life and then I qnet even more quiet. All while I passive-agressively vague tweeted about how I did, in fact, not like my job. But let's start from the beginning.
I already applied elsewhere in autumn, because I already knew that this job definitely wasn't for forever. Then December came, and with it my companys christmas party - we went there on a nine hour bus trip and it was a huge, gigantic party that I couldn't help but compare to the party in the Capitol in Hunger Games. Everything was decadent, a little too much, everyone was oh so important in their suits and coctail dresses, and I was in there and thought: Yes. This is the epitome of capitalism. All of this must have cost a fortune, just so all of us could tell ourself how very important we were, in a business that does not contribute to the everyday life of normal people but to other companies only.
It was a bit of a shock for me. But I guess this is business. And definitely a business that is not for me. I mean, objectively it is a good job, I get paid more than usual for my profession, I have flexible working hours, I do like my colleagues, and the work I do is not too demanding. And yet, I didn't feel good about it. I wasn't happy doing it. So I applied even more, actively looked for jobs that would suit me better, aware that I had until the end of January to quit on short notice before my probation ended and I had to give 3 months notice before leaving.
And then my mental health dropped it like it's hot. My mood went straight downhill, and with it, I got chronic stomach cramps. The day before my probation ended, I started crying the second I got home and pretty much didn't stop for hours. I had trouble falling asleep that night. My partner, who before advised to not quit until I got a new job, told me to do it anyway. I did not have a new job.
The next morning, I wrote a termination letter, printed it and took it with me to work, just in case. Then I had a long talk about it with a colleague/friend. And then, in a meeting, one of my superiors said something like "The company lives because of its passionate employees" and that settled it. I was not a passionate employee. So I went to speak to my manager about it.
It was rough. It was really rough. Quitting is hard. But I am very lucky because my manager was really understanding about it. He did offer me to try to change aspects that made me unhappy, but since we noticed quickly that the most important ones could not be changed, he said that he thinks it's great how I reflected what happened in those 6 months working here and took my conclusions from it. And that it was great how I listened to my guts. All in all, he respected my decision and made sure that we would make it work best for all, both the company and me. We expanded the notice to 8 weeks. This way, I have more time to find a new job and they have time to find a new employee to work my current job when I am gone. It's a great solution.
Now for the stomach aches, they are gone. After I quit, they slowly disappeared and have not resurfaced yet. Overall, I feel at peace, even though there is a bit of stress due to having to find a new job, but I guess that's normal.
There's a lot of people who think it's stupid what I have done. That I shouldn't have quit a job that gave me financial security. But is it worth my mental health and my happines? I don't think so.
In a lot of discussions there was the realization that this might me a millenial thing: We are painfully aware that financial security is not what it used to be. No one can assure me that this financial security will last anyway. It is more than unlikely for us to work for the same company for the rest of our life. Thus, it is more than unlikely to increase our wage by staying long. And for me as a bookseller, it is impossible to actually be paid enough to not have to think about money anymore. A friend put it like that: "We're generation internship. We are used to getting paid very little, if anything at all. Thus, the decision for us to make is: Do we want to work a shit job for little money or a job that we love for little money?" The answer is pretty clear. We just don't value money higher than happiness anymore, because we get less money anyway.
I feel really good about my decision and I will see what the future brings. If anything, I kept my integrity and stuck to being myself. So I guess that's something.
Showing posts with label life advise. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life advise. Show all posts
29.1.18
23.1.17
So you want to become a bookseller.
Ever since I started my apprenticeship in 2014 and started working as a bookseller, friends of mine (and friends of friends, and friends of friends of friends, and...) started stating that they would like to become one, too - or at least they heavily considered it.
I am not in the age anymore where you get all defensive about people doing your thing - in fact, I only started working in this field because I met my ex who is a passionate bookseller, told me about his job and gave me the opportunity to try it out at the shop he works at. When I hear people telling me that they want to do what I do, I feel like I am following in his footsteps, and since he is an amazing person with remarkable work ethics and so much love for what he does, I'd be proud if I was.
Thig is, I always feel like my job is not portrayed correctly. Not even by me. Of course I tend to only post/tweet about the nicr stuff. The moments that warm my heart and reassure me that I made the right choice. A lot of people seem to think that as a bookseller, you're mostly a bibliophile who gets paid for reading and gushing about books with customers - which is not inherently wrong, but simply not the whole truth.
To be very, very honest: I have seen a lot of people starting to work in this field and get disappointed, then frustrated, then quit because it is not what they expected.
And even though I love my job, my reality is very different to the reality of other booksellers (mostly due to a great team of coworkers and our amazing, kind customers) - and even I don't always love it.
To be very honest again: If it wasn't for my awesome colleagues and people in my life I can vent to, I wouldn't speak of my work half as fondly in public.
Now all of this may sound like I wanted to unsell becoming a bookseller to people. I really don't! But I think people should get disillusioned so they can choose this job without false expectations.
So here is a few tips and experiences that you should consider while considering a bookshop as your working place:
1. Think bookselling is reading and loving books for a paycheck? Think again!
As I said, my reality is really different to others. Yes, in my shop I get to read at work sometimes, and I get to gush about books I liked with customers. But this is an absolute exception. A lot of the other booksellers I know don't. It really depends where you're working. In a big chain? Forget it! In a small shop there might be the chance, but usually, there is too much to do. Because bookselling is, in the end, a retail job like any other retail job. There are things to be organized, shelves to be stocked, shelves to be cleaned, there is just so much to do most of the time. That I get to read is only due to the fact that I am still an apprentice and thus not qualified to do some of the work behind actually running a bookshop, and even then, it rarely happens that I am finished with everything and it's a quiet afternoon so I can spend time between customers reading. In fact, I am pretty sure that, once I started my next job, I'll have to go back to only reading in my free time.
2. Selling books is hard physical work!
This is also something that differs depending on where you work, but every shop has deliveries from publishers and wholesalers, and that means: hauling, hauling, hauling! If you are not at least a bit fit, either get fit or give up on that idea. Especially if you work for a shop that equips schools with textbooks, you'll be able to spend days just carrying tons of books from A to B and back. It's exhausting, and you will come home in the first few weeks and just fall asleep as soon as you went through the door. Promise!
3. Selling books is hard mental work!
Jup, it's both. This point is actually two points. First, it is mentally exhausting because you have to think a lot. You have to calculate a lot of stuff, even with the most mundane tasks you'll have to be fully concentrated because if you make one mistake you might be sending your company right into insolvency, and you have to be a true Sherlock Holmes, which brings be to the second point. If you work retail, it's inevitable that you will come across customers that will be very demanding. "I don't remember the title [nor the author nor the publisher nor anyting that might be actually something I can put in my catalogue to look it up] but the book was blue!" isn't a well-known phrase amongst booksellers for nothing. Or you get titles that are completely messed up from what they actually are. Or you get "You know, that English textbook for year 7!" Mate, there are literally a few hundred of those. Finding what your customer actually wants is something that will happen. Often. And you need to think, think, think. And, if you're lucky, remember all the books you ever saw in your life (not read, saw). And the ones your whole family, all your friends and your coworkers read. Being a catalogue on legs is helping a lot. I am still working to get to that point at some day right before my retirement.
4. It's not for introverts.
By that, I don't mean introvert as in having to recover all for yourself after spending time with people to charge your social battery again. I am that kind of introvert, and it's fine, really. I mean introvert as inbeing shy, being sensitive, generally prefering to be left alone. Soft skills are key in this field. You'll come across a lot of different kinds of people at work, and it is vital to treat all of them well, from the elderly highly-intellectual person over the soccer mom over the loud overly-excited lover of crime fiction over the sci-fi nerd to the small child who wants to spend their pocket money on Diaries Of A Whimpy Kid. No matter how they treat you. Keep smiling, stay polite, even if the soccer mom yells at you for ordering the exact English textbook for year 7 she pointed at the other day in your catalogue to be the book she needs that turned out to be the absolute wrong book for her childs class. This is hard as well, and you need to be thick-skinned to get through that. Luckily, I can say that, for me, that happens about... once a month, maybe? But those moments are hard, and it's a huge learning process to get to the point where you stop taking it personally and just get over with it. Just smile and wave - and vent to your coworker once there are no customers in the shop anymore.
5. It won't make you rich.
In fact, I am glad we have minimum wage in Germany, because when I finished my apprenticeship, if I work the same hours as I do now, I can comfortably survive on minimum wage as long as I still only have to feed myself. Bookselling is not a well-paying field. I compared wages with my boyfriends field the other day, and his entry wage will be my absolute top - ya know, in case I ever start my own company and it does well.
To be a bookseller, a Spongebob-like work ethic is helping a lot - you know, that episode where he pays Mr Krabbs for letting him work at the Krusty Krab? That. Being a bookseller is being an idealist. If you don't love the job enough that'd you'd do it for free, don't consider it.
If at this point you still think that sounds like a lot of fun - congrats, you have what it takes to be an awesome bookseller, and I'd be happy to have you as a colleague some day! Because, and this is important: In the end of the day, no matter how long and exhausting it was, no matter how much my back and my head hurt, I still wouldn't want to do anything else. Being a tad masochist helps, I guess.
I would still recommend, if possible, to do an internship at a bookshop first. Try it. Actually live it for a week or two and see how it feels. I am still not sure if I would be as enthusiastic about it if I didn't know what I got myself into beforehand. Maybe I would've been disappointed as well.
I am so very glad I wasn't.
I am not in the age anymore where you get all defensive about people doing your thing - in fact, I only started working in this field because I met my ex who is a passionate bookseller, told me about his job and gave me the opportunity to try it out at the shop he works at. When I hear people telling me that they want to do what I do, I feel like I am following in his footsteps, and since he is an amazing person with remarkable work ethics and so much love for what he does, I'd be proud if I was.
Thig is, I always feel like my job is not portrayed correctly. Not even by me. Of course I tend to only post/tweet about the nicr stuff. The moments that warm my heart and reassure me that I made the right choice. A lot of people seem to think that as a bookseller, you're mostly a bibliophile who gets paid for reading and gushing about books with customers - which is not inherently wrong, but simply not the whole truth.
To be very, very honest: I have seen a lot of people starting to work in this field and get disappointed, then frustrated, then quit because it is not what they expected.
And even though I love my job, my reality is very different to the reality of other booksellers (mostly due to a great team of coworkers and our amazing, kind customers) - and even I don't always love it.
To be very honest again: If it wasn't for my awesome colleagues and people in my life I can vent to, I wouldn't speak of my work half as fondly in public.
Now all of this may sound like I wanted to unsell becoming a bookseller to people. I really don't! But I think people should get disillusioned so they can choose this job without false expectations.
So here is a few tips and experiences that you should consider while considering a bookshop as your working place:
1. Think bookselling is reading and loving books for a paycheck? Think again!
As I said, my reality is really different to others. Yes, in my shop I get to read at work sometimes, and I get to gush about books I liked with customers. But this is an absolute exception. A lot of the other booksellers I know don't. It really depends where you're working. In a big chain? Forget it! In a small shop there might be the chance, but usually, there is too much to do. Because bookselling is, in the end, a retail job like any other retail job. There are things to be organized, shelves to be stocked, shelves to be cleaned, there is just so much to do most of the time. That I get to read is only due to the fact that I am still an apprentice and thus not qualified to do some of the work behind actually running a bookshop, and even then, it rarely happens that I am finished with everything and it's a quiet afternoon so I can spend time between customers reading. In fact, I am pretty sure that, once I started my next job, I'll have to go back to only reading in my free time.
2. Selling books is hard physical work!
This is also something that differs depending on where you work, but every shop has deliveries from publishers and wholesalers, and that means: hauling, hauling, hauling! If you are not at least a bit fit, either get fit or give up on that idea. Especially if you work for a shop that equips schools with textbooks, you'll be able to spend days just carrying tons of books from A to B and back. It's exhausting, and you will come home in the first few weeks and just fall asleep as soon as you went through the door. Promise!
3. Selling books is hard mental work!
Jup, it's both. This point is actually two points. First, it is mentally exhausting because you have to think a lot. You have to calculate a lot of stuff, even with the most mundane tasks you'll have to be fully concentrated because if you make one mistake you might be sending your company right into insolvency, and you have to be a true Sherlock Holmes, which brings be to the second point. If you work retail, it's inevitable that you will come across customers that will be very demanding. "I don't remember the title [nor the author nor the publisher nor anyting that might be actually something I can put in my catalogue to look it up] but the book was blue!" isn't a well-known phrase amongst booksellers for nothing. Or you get titles that are completely messed up from what they actually are. Or you get "You know, that English textbook for year 7!" Mate, there are literally a few hundred of those. Finding what your customer actually wants is something that will happen. Often. And you need to think, think, think. And, if you're lucky, remember all the books you ever saw in your life (not read, saw). And the ones your whole family, all your friends and your coworkers read. Being a catalogue on legs is helping a lot. I am still working to get to that point at some day right before my retirement.
4. It's not for introverts.
By that, I don't mean introvert as in having to recover all for yourself after spending time with people to charge your social battery again. I am that kind of introvert, and it's fine, really. I mean introvert as inbeing shy, being sensitive, generally prefering to be left alone. Soft skills are key in this field. You'll come across a lot of different kinds of people at work, and it is vital to treat all of them well, from the elderly highly-intellectual person over the soccer mom over the loud overly-excited lover of crime fiction over the sci-fi nerd to the small child who wants to spend their pocket money on Diaries Of A Whimpy Kid. No matter how they treat you. Keep smiling, stay polite, even if the soccer mom yells at you for ordering the exact English textbook for year 7 she pointed at the other day in your catalogue to be the book she needs that turned out to be the absolute wrong book for her childs class. This is hard as well, and you need to be thick-skinned to get through that. Luckily, I can say that, for me, that happens about... once a month, maybe? But those moments are hard, and it's a huge learning process to get to the point where you stop taking it personally and just get over with it. Just smile and wave - and vent to your coworker once there are no customers in the shop anymore.
5. It won't make you rich.
In fact, I am glad we have minimum wage in Germany, because when I finished my apprenticeship, if I work the same hours as I do now, I can comfortably survive on minimum wage as long as I still only have to feed myself. Bookselling is not a well-paying field. I compared wages with my boyfriends field the other day, and his entry wage will be my absolute top - ya know, in case I ever start my own company and it does well.
To be a bookseller, a Spongebob-like work ethic is helping a lot - you know, that episode where he pays Mr Krabbs for letting him work at the Krusty Krab? That. Being a bookseller is being an idealist. If you don't love the job enough that'd you'd do it for free, don't consider it.
If at this point you still think that sounds like a lot of fun - congrats, you have what it takes to be an awesome bookseller, and I'd be happy to have you as a colleague some day! Because, and this is important: In the end of the day, no matter how long and exhausting it was, no matter how much my back and my head hurt, I still wouldn't want to do anything else. Being a tad masochist helps, I guess.
I would still recommend, if possible, to do an internship at a bookshop first. Try it. Actually live it for a week or two and see how it feels. I am still not sure if I would be as enthusiastic about it if I didn't know what I got myself into beforehand. Maybe I would've been disappointed as well.
I am so very glad I wasn't.
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